In depth

Anime Bondage: Naruto (pt 1)

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Okay….here we go.

If you read my previous post: Thank you, first of all.

This is going to be fun.

So, why use anime to talk about this?

Because anime literally has spiritual battles in pretty much every show. Even innocent shows tend to use things like aura; the show Fruits Basket uses the idea of thought Waves; and curses.

What brought this to a head for me was recently starting Naruto, and Fairy Tail. I know I’m late to the party, but I never watched anime till the last 10 months or so. I know that most weebos probably will already know about Naruto.

I’m getting the worst over with first, because Naruto has unusually dark examples of this, but with both Naruto and Fairy Tail I will be going over the kind of spiritual problem that is not actually your fault.

That said, let’s…wade in, you really should’t dive into this subject headfirst.

So, Naruto had 4 huge examples of demons and spiritual issues, and plenty of smaller ones.

If you watched it you’ve already guessed I’m going to bring up Gaara and Sasuke, but I also want to use Neji and Naruto himself as examples.

I’ll tackle Gaara first, since he’s the biggest, in a way.

For the non-fans, here’s the skinny on this character.

Gaara of the desert: Tragic past, has sand raccoon spirit inside him that kills people, can’t sleep because of it or it will take over, was bound to the spirit since birth.

Gaara did not choose to be possessed or to be bound to a demon. As he tells his story, his village put the monster inside of him in order to gain power for their people, they killed his mother in order to link it to him. It’s an awful story.

(I’ve only gotten through part of the first show, by the way, so if I get anything wrong, please forgive me. It will still illustrate my point either way.)

Gaara, as a child, didn’t like being that way. He wondered why people were afraid of him, why he kept hurting them by accident, and why he felt unloved.

Then, as the story goes, his uncle told him the truth, and told him no one would love him, so he should love himself.

Gaara, under the trauma of the moment, snapped and resolved to live only to kill people who tried to kill him, or who struck him as powerful enough to validate his existence…or to kill in general.

We might all wish this story was an exaggeration, but it’s not. We’ve heard the news stories of people like this.

But I can go further, because I know also what caused it.

The show doesn’t hide that it’s a demonic problem. This kind is a serous kind, it’s something known as a blood oath or blood tie.

It’s most common in cults to do it.

My family knew a girl once who had a blood oath with an evil spirit.

I prefer not to get into it too much, but these oaths usually involve sacrificing an animal, or cutting yourself. The Bible tells us never to do this as an act of penance or worship. Self-harm is forbidden.

God made the body, He made it to work. He made it as a gift to us, he does not want us beating it up like its garbage.

The result of a blood oath is not something I know much about, I can say it’s likely to be like Gaara, the person will probably deal with not being able to control themselves, or with being haunted by pain and guilt. With feeling alone.

The really serious part though is that just casting it out is not likely to work with that kind of bondage.

Every bondage can be broken, but spiritual warfare is very specific.

I’m not writing out steps to it here, it would be foolish for me to try to walk you through it. You may not need it, and on the off chance you’re reading this and you do need it, you’d need a more specific approach than a blog can provide.

This is just to help identify the problem and solution. And if you’re into anime, it might also be interesting for you.

Anyway, with a blood tie, with any tie where death was part of how it happened, you need to know Jesus, and His blood has to cover you, His death has to free you. That’s the only thing powerful enough. An evil power has to be cancelled by a higher good power.

Holy water isn’t going to cut it, in other words. Actually, Holy Water is not scriptural, I’ve never heard of it working.

Gaara’s case goes further though than just the blood tie.

The strength of all bondage is lies. A curse can’t stick without a cause.

Gaara was first neglected, then traumatized, at a very young age before he could even begin to know how to make sense of it. Sadly, this is common to many kids, especially ones whose parents dabble in the occult. They often don’t get a choice about being raised in the darkness of that.

But there are amazing stories of people coming out of that thanks to God’s intervention.

With trauma, you have to walk through it. Demons stick to brokenness like sharks to blood, or leeches, if you will. It’s necessary to seek healing if something terrible happened to you that started your problem, or to someone you know. That applies even if it’s more emotional and not spiritual, but it’s rarely one or the other, it’s almost always both.

There is healing in Jesus.

There is one more part to freedom.

Gaara took the wrong path, he stands as a foil to Naruto, when he’s first introduced before his redemption arc, because he took the dark path.

He wasn’t given much of a choice, unlike Naruto, he can’t control his power well, he also was born to be an assassin, and his village didn’t really make it an option. A man who’s got no way out will usually learn to like his prison, in a twisted way, because the torment would be too much to bear otherwise.

It’s like being a masochist. Something is broken inside you, but you can’t fix it, so you come to enjoy being broken and bruised as a way out.

In Mark, I think, Jesus casts a demon out of a boy who had it since childhood, and it tried to kill him with fire and water many times. Jesus says that this kind only comes out by prayer and fasting.

It’s harder with long-standing problems.

If you have had a problem like this, don’t try to deal with it alone. Seek deliverance, but use wisdom. See what kind of reputation the place has. Or find some Christian who understand these things to pray with you privately. It’s always better to have help, more than one person preferably, with things this intense. As Gaara points out, Solitude eats away at everyone if it’s not addressed.

And, never believe you are a monster, if you have a monstrous feeling, it’s not you. There’s a way out.

Thanks for sticking it out, until nest time, stay true–Natasha

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The 411 on Spirits (bad and good).

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I have a weird subject today. Warning: If you don’t believe in the spiritual realm, you will probably find this post disconcerting.

I think people are surprised to learn Christians believe in demons, it tends to be treated as the same as believing in ghosts, curses, and magic.

What’s more surprising to me is how many Christians believe in angels, but don’t seem to think about there being a dark side to spiritual things.

I wish there wasn’t, believe me, but it’s impossible to believe that if you’re paying attention to what’s going on with the word and the people you know.

So, I am one of those Christians who believes in all of it, I think ghosts are real (but they are not actually people, they are spirits disguised as people); possession; curses; and magic (also demonic); I believe in miracles, I know people who were healed by prayer. I go to a church where that happens frequently, as a matter of fact.

It’s easier to say all this stuff is fake if you’ve never bothered to look into it.

I remember when I was younger, my non-christian relatives were watching a show about ghosts haunting houses, and I objected to it. My grandma said “How’s it any different from what you believe in?” Or was it my aunt, or both.

Well might you ask that, actually.

Not to sound stuck up, but to someone who’s met God, the idea that demonic activity and divine activity are the same thing is… disgustingly ridiculous.

Let me say, people mistake demons for God, it’s happen all throughout history (Idolatry) but, as C. S. Lewis pointed out, you cannot make the opposite mistake. Not usually. Once you know God, you are much harder to fool.

I’ve made the opposite mistake myself, but when God is actually speaking to me, I don’t often think it’s something else.

I know that a lot of people have been burned by Christians obsessed with spiritual warfare and with visitations of the Holy Spirit. I will say, some do focus too much on God showing up in a moment of time, and not enough on the fact that we are meant to be carrying his presence in us all day, everyday.

God is the most important thing, there is no mistake about that. God must be first.

The evil spirits in the world are deadly to non-believers, but more of a nuisance to believers, except in extreme cases.

I believe that many mental health problems are actually demonic problems. Often it’s both that and trauma and life choices combining to leave a person in a very dark place.

Chances are, if you live in a country in Africa or Asia, you may actually already believe in this stuff, I’m aware it’s common knowledge in a lot of the world. If you live in the West…it’s not really as rare as people think.

I’ve read so many stories, and met people who’ve had experiences with that kind of thing. Actual skeptics are rare. In my college, secular college, English class, when my teacher brought up ghosts, not many people didn’t believe in them. I don’t remember any, off the top of my head.

So, I realize you actually may not disbelieve me, and I’m going to write accordingly. If you do think I’m crazy…well, I don’t really care, actually.

That said, people who know this is for real often are scared to death of it. OR prefer not to think of it. The attitude with demons and curses and spirits is that they are beyond our control, and so we had better just hope not to run into them.

The idea in pretty much all horror movies is that monsters or psychos cannot be stopped by people, so you have to hope you’re not the main victim in the story. I hate those movies for that very reason.

It’s not true, actually.

What people arguably find harder to believe than the existence of demons is Christian’s way of handling the matter. Because it’s quite simple. We take authority over it.

That demons cannot be fought against or stopped is the biggest lie about them, and the one they love to perpetuate…I’ve heard them do so.

(I don’t converse with demons by the way, I’ve seen people attacked by them.)

I am not claiming to be an expert on this subject, all this is what you’ll find int he Bible alone, without theology.

The way it works is if you truly know God, he puts His Spirit into you, the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit does not control you, it’s not possession, it’s more like the bond between a husband and wife. Being one and yet still two separate people.

The Holy Spirit is what makes us children of God. It is what brings our own spirit back to life after being dead in sin. It is also our defense against the evil one.

The solution to evil is always to overcome it with good. Overcoming demons is the natural outcome of carrying the Spirit of God, not the goal of it.

Demons seem scary until you’ve met God, and then…they seem small and pathetic.

Actually, the Bible says that at the end of time when the Devil himself is revealed, the kings of the earth will look narrowly upon him and be amazed that such a small thing made the world tremble.

Jesus also commissioned His followers to cast out demons. He spent about 1/3 of his Ministry doing that and healing, if I remember correctly.

Also, the Bible warns us that nonbelievers should never try to cast out demons. There is a story in Acts about it happening, and the demons tore their clothes off and chased them out. Saying “Jesus I know, and Paul (a christian) I know, but who are you?”

Spiritual authority is about identity. Those who belong to God have Christ’s authority, those who do not don’t.

Now, it maybe someone who’s dabbled in this subject will be thinking “What about witches? What about people who claim to do this who are not Christians? What about physics?”

The answer: They’re fake.

the power isn’t, but I read a story in “The Cross and the Switchblade” about a dabbler like that trying to rid someone of a demon, it failed.

Some of these people know Christians are a threat, by the way. My church had a witch show up to curse it for several weeks, nothing happened, I think she eventually got saved actually.

I’m not making this up. Believe it’s real or not, but these people do believe it’s real, and they hate Christians.

As for fortune tellers, we are warned to stay away from them. Even if what they say comes to pass, no good ever came of going to them for it, as Macbeth makes clear.

Since I’m ticking people off, I might as well add that horoscopes are also off limits. Astrology is not something to screw around with.

Get mad at me if you wish, but what do you think is behind it?

However, maybe you aren’t mad, maybe you believe me, and you’re scared.

I know, because I used to be also.

So, I’m going to end this with a reassurance: Whatever you might have seen, the powers of darkness are nothing to God. It might be you’ve been a person who’s had that problem yourself, maybe your whole life. Maybe church didn’t give you an answer for it, I’m sad when I think of how many churches are ignorant of it.

Whatever the case, you don’t have to live in it. God can take the worst darkness and destroy it. Sometimes it only seems overwhelming and terrible because we’ve never seen the alternative.

And if you were a christian and read this far, I’d encourage you to research this if you never have, and learn how to pray about it.

I’m not trying to teach you warfare, I don’t think a blog is the best place to do that on, people might get weird ideas out of context.

I just want you to be aware of it.

I’ve never gone into it a whole lot because I expect people to think I’m nuts, but if you’ve followed me for awhile, you now I’m not obsessed with this stuff, I prefer to talk about normal things most of the time.

I actually only decided to address this because anime often deals with the subject, and I began to think: so many people watch anime, and if they see this and have similar experiences, they may try to apply what they see because it’s all they’ve ever seen about it.

And anime rarely provides the solution to such problems accurately, I plan on doing a follow up post about that with specific characters from different shows, so if you found this interesting but would prefer to discuss it fictionally and not in real life, check that out.

Or if you’re simply curious about what I’ll say, even if you aren’t buying this at all.

Or if the subject bugs you and you want to learn more about defeating it.

Whatever the case, until then, stay true–Natasha.

 

Jealousy.

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I had a crazy last week guys, so I didn’t post.

Fun fact: My out of state friends tell me that you don’t refer to girls or mixed groups as “guys” in some states. Maybe that’s going out now that we share so much media, but apparently it marks me as a West Coast gal.

Now, you’re seriously going to wonder about it the next time you see someone use it, right?

Anyway, I have a myriad of weighty subjects I could write about, and probably will, but I’ve been considering for a while that I should write a post about Jealousy.

I’ve mentioned it before, that there’s good and bad jealousy, but I apparently ave never devoted a whole post to it. So here goes…

Guys: You need to get more jealous.

Yeah, I said it.

I’ll cut to the chase, according to the Bible, Jealousy is a godly quality.

“Do not worship any other god, for the LORD, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God.” (Exodus 34:14.)

I saw in some comment section somewhere that this person was talking God down for being described as jealous. God has been criticized for this declaration.

It certainly can be annoying, if you are trying to devote yourself to other things besides God, to have Him always interfering with it. A lot of trouble in life happens because we chase after false gods, and the Lord destroys them, much how H destroys their idols and altars in the Bible.

Jealousy is a consuming fire, as God describes Himself to be. But we should be grateful for that, because int he same way that fire destroys what we love and idolize, it also eats up the things we find ourselves in bondage to.

God will not have us enslaved to fear, doubt, and depression any more than to pleasures. He is just as jealous that the darkness will not have us as He is that false light will not.

There are some movies and shows and books that have beautifully portrayed this with human relationships. Often ones with a bit riskier of a plot. A character had a love interest that had a darkness or flaw that they can’t seem to shake, the character proceeds to love with a fierce kind of love, ready to go to any lengths to deliver them from their darkness.

The infamous Luke and Darth Vader example isn’t the most poignant for jealousy specifically, but it shows a little bit of it.

I really love that type of story.

Often we do not think of that as jealousy.

Jealousy is a fierce hatred for something that steals away your beloved. Anything that takes what you feel is rightfully yours from you.

It gets a bad rap because people are so flawed that they take jealousy to an extreme it shouldn’t be taken to. They want to own more than they should.

In an odd paradox, you really can have someone belong to you completely, yet belong to themselves at the same time. The more free they are, the more yours they are. Good jealousy exists to protect that freedom form outsiders who might try to steal it away be deceit or by force.

Jealousy, in romance, is a sign that the relationship is real, usually. There are petty people who will be jealous over nothing. It’s also not right to be jealous of someone who’s already committed to another person. even if you can’t help the feeling, you shouldn’t act on it.

Yet, I really can’t stand the thought of being with a guy who wouldn’t get at least a little upset if he caught me with another guy, or another guy was hitting on me in front of him.

I’ve liked someone for quite a while, and I got surprised by the amount of jealousy I felt over the thought of him dating someone else. (We’re not together, sadly, but the idea made me mad anyway.)

I am no stranger to jealousy of other types too. My emotionally abusive father liked to make me jealous on purpose. Plenty of parents do it by accident, he would deliberately provoke me.

Oh, yeah, people can be provoked to jealousy.

We all have heard a story about the girlfriend or wife who messes with her husband to get him to prove a point.

I actually don’t think that is always wrong. Don’t set someone up for failure, but to reasonably test their loyalty is sometimes appropriate.

“Set me as a seal upon your heart, As a seal upon your arm; For love is as strong as death, Jealousy as cruel as the grave; Its flames are flames of fire, A most vehement flame.” (Song of Solomon 8:6)

In this verse, a new bride is telling her husband to put her as a seal on his arm, and heart, warning him that love and jealousy are like death, relentless.

Love is relentless trying to do good to the beloved, and if the beloved wanders from that, ceases to receive it or to be around for it, Love will be painful like death. The loss and grief of love is a lot like losing someone to death, as you who have had very painful breakups can attest to.

On top of that, if the beloved goes to another source for what he or she should only get form you, jealousy will seek to remove that source by any means necessary.

And yet, the bride warning her groom is done in a pure and passionate tone that I find very compelling. It is not said in cruelty or bitterness or even in distrust. The Bride simple recognizes that her beloved is precious, and others besides her may want to steal him away.

There’s a desire in women, and I think men too (I’m not one) to protect someone by the sheer act of loving them. AS if all the love we pour into a person could be like a shield to them from evil.

The truth is, it can be. Love will not stop you from suffering, but if you’ve received it and let it sink deeply into your heart and soul, that love can protect you from suffering destroying who you are.

Love is joy even in the worst of circumstances. Peace in the face of trouble. Hope when there is nothing else to hope for.

If anyone can love us, then, there must be something worth living for and waiting for. Love itself proves the existence of better things. Nothing so wonderful could exist if the world was all bad.

And we should protect that with all the jealousy we can muster. It’s why toxic relationships have to be ended. Protect your ability to love and be loved above all else, people.

And if you meet someone who’s as fierce about that as you are, you stick with that one.

Well, that’s all I have to say for now, until next time–Natasha.

The Element of Wisdom–2

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My sister suggested I do a follow-up post about Wisdom in stories, and after looking it over, I do think there is more to say:

I used Pyrrha Nikos as an example of a wise character, and one who caused wiser writing decisions.  ( see post here –https://drybonestruth.wordpress.com/2019/07/05/the-element-of-wisdom)

But the question I didn’t really answer was What does Wise storytelling actually look like?

We know what it doesn’t look like.

Often, I think writers sometimes make wise decisions that are misunderstood by fans. Mostly by the nitpicking ones.

I’ve seen analysts actually complain that a story had too much of a message, and that it should blur the lines between right and wrong.

In fact, some fans are defending the new Star Wars movies on just such grounds, that they made it more grey.

It might be best to make a distinction then between worldly wisdom and godly wisdom.

Worldly Wisdom: It is wisdom that consists of knowing how to work the system, how to get what you want, how to climb and succeed in this society. How to not be duped by scammers. Worldly Wisdom can look like caution and common sense, but the one thing it can almost never look is Unselfish. Even when it says it is helping you, you are really helping it.

“Here we go again, give it one more try, don’t believe the system’s on your side”–Switchfoot, Rise Above It.

Worldly Wisdom can be good in small amounts (running a successful business is no sin,) but it must be tempered with other virtues, or it makes you into a selfish, arrogant, cynic.

Godly Wisdom: “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom” (Proverbs 8:10) this wisdom is based on knowing right from wrong. It focuses on the meaning of things.

“Do you ponder the manner of things? In the dark?”–Glitter and Gold.

Proverbs is the book of the Bible that talks the most about Wisdom, and it always connects it to being able to do what is right, and to happiness.

Interesting then, that Solomon, the wisest man in the old testament, also wrote Ecclesiastes. The most pessimistic book in the Bible. In it, he admits that he turned his heart from God, and found that every other thing was, in the end, empty.

He would have been better off living a simple, hardworking life, he thinks. Like the Happy Peasant, but even this, he says, is vanity.

Eccl 12:1, 8-11, 13-14 “Remember now your Creator in the days of your youth,
Before the difficult days come… Vanity of vanities,” says the Preacher, “All is vanity.”

And moreover, because the Preacher was wise, he still taught the people knowledge; yes, he pondered and sought out and set in order many proverbs. 10 The Preacher sought to find acceptable words; and what was written was upright—words of truth. 11 The words of the wise are like goads, and the words of scholars are like well-driven nails, given by one Shepherd.

 Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter:

Fear God and keep His commandments,
For this is man’s all.  For God will bring every work into judgment,
Including every secret thing,
Whether good or evil.”

Solomon wrote proverbs and they were good, he says, but they are like goads to drive us forward and like nails that hold things in place.

Wisdom, one might conclude, is about limitation. Knowing how to control yourself, how to stay away form evil, having a compass.

There is something about doing right that I find very few people outside of Christianity seem to understand. There are traces of it in the idea that it is better to give than to receive, which people still embrace, but not much place else.

People in the bible speak of doing good like it is their greatest pleasure, David says he delights himself in God’s commandments.

People tend to assume this means being a prude, a stickler for rules, maybe even OCD about them.

But this is not about panicking if rules are broken. Rule lovers can be more stressed out than rule breakers, we all know that.

This is about literal joy in doing what is good. In knowing what is good.

I pity people who do not know what that joy feels like. It is no coincidence that this pluralistic society is also a depressed one.

Depression has always followed moral depravity, because people miss that Goodness itself is the greatest joy, and that is why good people are so reluctant to step out of it.

Think of your favorite show, and if it has a character that the fandom world calls “pure”, that character is almost always a happier, cheerful one.

Proverbs 8:35 says “For whoever finds me [wisdom] finds life, and obtains favor from the Lord.”

Proverbs also repeatedly says that wise children will make their parents rejoice.

“Happy in the man who finds wisdom, and the man who gains understanding.” (Prov 3:13 emphasis mine.)

A hallmark of a wise character, or writer, is that they will bring gladness to the story they are in.
Pyrrha certainly did this, watching her made me feel uplifted about my own life.
A wise writer delights their readers with the rightness of their decisions. “A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in a setting of silver.” (Prov 25:11)
Happy events come because of wise characters, or they speak comfort or inspiration to other characters that gives them strength to go on.
Wisdom is life: Wise characters are usually the ones who make the choices that lead to saving people.
It can even be saving their heart, as MHA says, it can be talking them off the ledge, talking them our of doing something evil.
Showing mercy where mercy was needed.
Wisdom also brings about justice: You know the characters who can lay a verbal smack down on someone who is acting up, can decide how to stop a problem, and can dole out a fair punishment, if they have to.
Wisdom is knowing how to handle people, but godly wisdom is knowing how to do this in a way that will promote their well being.
In writing, an author has to be unselfish. It can be easy to use our characters to make your readers happy, with zero regard for how much it actually helps the characters or the story.
Analysts complain about a lack of continuity in shows and movie series mostly because it services the author more than the characters to be inconsistent. I can think of a few times where ignoring the past and doing something different helped a story  *cough X–Men *cough. But usually it doesn’t.

 

There is also pandering, which is a huge problem with popular shows. Especially in anime.

Fans can push for wise decisions, but a lot of the time they are only thinking about what they want, and not what is best for the story.

It may seem silly to say fictional characters deserve some consideration, but I’ve never noticed any discrepancy with how writers treat fictional and real people.

Charles Dickens was known to not treat real people very well, and his characters he treated even worse.

People who work at loving other people tend to write stories than incorporate that theme. Hannah Hurnard is one example. So is C. S. Lewis.

And my values of helping people be the best person they can be are certainly reflected in all forms of my writing, including this blog.

So when I say writers need to be unselfish with their characters and story, I mean it quite seriously.

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All this is wisdom.

Until next time–Natasha

Fluttershy is a difficult character.

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Let me preface this by saying I love Fluttershy, she’s my favorite character.

It’s because of that I say she’s difficult.

I don’t mean difficult is a bad thing, I actually think it’s a good thing. It’s like when people say women are difficult to understand, but it’s good to not be easy to figure out all the time, we shouldn’t always get answers handed to us.

I have to say that Fluttershy from MLP (My Little Pony) is character that is a good example of a show trying to do the hard thing.

You can have a character with a really good flaw and growth arc, and people will love it, and you may never get criticized for it (though I doubt it) but ultimately, we know it’s unrealistic. Who gets over it that quickly?

I think of MHA (My Hero Academia) and the character of Todoroki, he gets a major arc in season 2, but in season 3 we find out he has not completely gotten over what his issues were. He relapses briefly into resentment and hate before snapping out of it, he realizes he has a ways to go still.

No one hates him for this because we recognize it makes sense.

I think of a different character on that show whose arc is similar to Fluttershy’s, Momo Yaoyerozo’s, she has a confidence issue that she confronts in season 2, she doesn’t seem to have that problem again later.

You could say she just completely got over it and moved on, and that the arc was contrived to begin with, and some people do say that.

But Momo’s confidence came initially from never failing, never really doing badly, even when she didn’t do the best, she was always close. Then she fails big time and begins to wonder if she only succeed before because she never was out of her comfort zone. When she regains her confidence, she realizes she can still try and do well even if she makes mistakes. Her confidence over the next season has a more refined feel to it.

It’s not the same as Fluttershy’s story because the reasons for a lack of confidence were different.

And I want to talk about Fluttershy because, though I am far more like Momo now, and sometimes like Todoroki, I used to be Fluttershy.

Watching MLP, I took a quick liking to Fluttershy, I have an affinity for sweet but sassy characters, who doesn’t?

But as I watched more episodes I began to understand why people found her annoying. She repeats her mistakes a lot. She is often irrationally afraid of things. Scared of her own shadow. It seems ridiculous.

What I think is funny is that I’m sure 50% of the people who criticize her for this are bigger cowards than her. I overall don’t think people are especially brave. They rarely do things that make them really uncomfortable, and not often with the grace Fluttershy can at least attempt to have.

It’s been said that courage is not a lack of fear, and just because you are not afraid of that many things doesn’t make you braver than someone who is afraid of everything. Fear is crippling condition to have, and Fear of One thing is just as likely to ruin your life as fear of many things, you just aren’t as likely to notice it.

I am now, at 20, the type of chick who likes hardcore music, fight scenes, and starting controversial conversations. I’m loud, not afraid of being on a stage, and able to stand up for myself.

But I remember that I was once pretty much Fluttershy.

My mom used to get frustrated with how anxious I was all the time, much like Rainbow Dash does. She’s try to talk me out of being afraid to go to social events. I was homeschooled, being around people was something I wasn’t forced to do a lot, but that had nothing to do with being shy, I know plenty of homeschoolers who are not shy. It’s just a personality trait.

I am not shy now. Few people guess I ever was.

I used to be one of those people who think their food or drink got poisoned mysteriously after being left alone for two minutes. I was afraid of mirrors sometimes. I was a hypochondriac. Ironically, I was not a socially anxious person about actually conversations if I had them, that came after years of being told I offended people by accident. But I was shy of starting any conversations.

I’ve always been opinionated, and that never changed. But it didn’t help much. I don’t think shyness makes you less opinionated, since you are less likely to be challenged on opinions no one knows you have.

Like all anxious people, I’d imagine a bunch of ways things could go wrong.

Saying it, it feels so surreal. This is so far from how I spend the majority of my time now, that I’ve almost forgotten I did it.

I think, actually, that that is why Fluttershy gets so much hate. She reminds people like me, who got out of that mindset, what it was like to be in it.

And people do not like to be reminded of it. Remembering being a coward is not fun.

Actually, I do not think Fluttershy is a coward, but it can feel like that to the person. Fear involves torment, even remembering a fear can make you start thinking like that again. Like triggering traumatic events.

I can say, looking back, I was fearful but I’m not sure I was a coward. I gave in to fear a lot, but sometimes I didn’t. A coward is someone who never ever pushes past it, and it is about more than being afraid, a coward lacks loyalty to something more important than fear.

Fluttershy has that.

A coward is selfish. Fluttershy is not selfish, just timid, but timid can be helped because timid can still find something more important than fear.

The cowardice is being afraid to care. Fluttershy has never been afraid to care, and that is her best quality to my mind, she is braver than most of the other characters. It takes major guts to care about Discord. She doesn’t bat an eyelash at that.

There is one more thing though, and that is how easy it is to judge Fluttershy. Even I sometimes want to. But there are so many people like her, should I judge them?

Sometimes I want to. I work with kids, and that kind of shyness is something I see a lot. I wish they didn’t have it because I remember how much I missed enjoying being I wallowed in fears.

But here’s the thing: I’m reminded that God does not despise people who have fears.

God does not like cowardice. But if you are genuinely afraid and wishing you weren’t, God does not despise that. In fact, through out the Bible, Fear is the vice God is shown to be the most compassionate and least harsh toward. Sometimes He gets fed up when people repeatedly disobey Him out of fear, but He’ll be more patient with that than with other flaws.

God knows it is hard to not be afraid, the truth is, not all fears are valid, but fear itself is certainly understandable. The world is dangerous. Without God, we all would be right to be terrified.

But with God, we don’t need to be.

As 1 John says, God is love, and perfect love casts out fear.

God is the only reason I do not live in fear anymore.

But I, who have been set free, still need to be compassionate to those who haven’t been. If I come down on them, I am only doing what I hated people doing to me when I was faird. Fear involves torment because it also involves guilt. Believe me, if you know an anxious person, they feel guilty constantly for their hesitancy.

Actually, those of us who were afraid once can be the hardest on people who still are. Because we got over it.

It’s pure stupidity, to be honest. We think “Oh, I kicked it. I snapped out of it. I pulled myself up by my bootstraps.”

Yeah, it’s idiotic. I’m pretty sure anyone who claims they got out of their fear alone is a liar.

No, we were helped. We shown compassion. Someone helped us stand when we couldn’t get up ourselves.

The reason to be bold is obvious once you have become bold, but never beforehand.

i still get scared, mind you. And I have to remind myself not to be like this. I have the power to now. But it took years and years of small steps.

Fluttershy eventually realizes it’s baby steps to boldness. And she has loving support.

Sometimes when I panicked as a younger Christian, it just helped to have someone tell me it was okay to be scared. That is was legitimate. But that it was false.

Looking back, I want to tell myself that there are always things to be afraid of, but fear doesn’t make them go away, and there is too much to enjoy to waste time worrying.

But I can only say that now because God made that a part of who I am. I didn’t start from that place.

So, Fluttershy is a difficult character because she is an honest one. Fear comes back over and over, but those who overcome it again and again with become Bold.

 

Until next time–Natasha.

Sanders Sides Fandom–What the heck?

/ toseealife / Leave a comment

Hello, so this is a pretty specific post, kind of a rant post, my sister and I are collaborating on it, so some of these thoughts are from her.

This happens in every fandom, not just the Thomas Sanders one, it just so happens that his exploded after the Intrusive Thoughts vid I mentioned a couple posts ago, into a prime example of this phenomenon, if it is a phenomenon.

So, Remus, the embodiment of Intrusive Thoughts, basically the embodiment of the word smut, has become….popular.

He’s been shipped with people.

People are adopting him as their smutty son.

He’s made a splash…

My feelings: AHHHHHHHHH!     😤😠😯😢😡😧😬😥

Sister: This is not surprising, unfortunately. We’ve seen it happening before with similar characters but it’s more obvious here, because this character is just so focused on beignt he embodiment of all terrible thoughts…like just the worst.

Me: Yeah… so why are people adopting him. As their son!

Sister: For one thing, they feel like they’re like him.

ME: HOW?

Sister: They feel like they are like him because–which is actually really sad–because the whole point was Thomas convincing himself that he wasn’t like Remus, that Remus was intrusive not a reflection of himself. But these people don’t get that. They don’t have that freedom, Sanders has a limited freedom, but compared to theirs, it’s still more.

Me: I don’t think Thomas was trying to give people a complex about loving intrusive thoughts, since Remus is basically a bully, to Thomas. A jerk, not good at all. The Dark Sides are the sides that do nothing good for Thomas, especially Remus, because even deceit can at least help him realize the truth by arguing with him, but Remus doesn’t help him at all. He just stresses him out.

S: So this brings us back to the question, why are people–ugh– attracted to Remus?

Me: You have an answer?

S: Your thought first.

Me: What I think, is that people strain out a gnat and swallow a camel. Like we nitpick the smallest, stupidest things, but then we accept the most outrageous stuff because it is outrageous on purpose. I think that people don’t think of Remus as a character showing a problem, they only see his flamboyant personality. And many people would say there is nothing wrong with liking his personality, as long as you are admitting that is what you like.

But the problem with that is, again, straining out a gnat, this one thing you like, and swallowing a camel by accepting all the things that come with it. Liking Remus means not noticing how bad he really is. Because his personality is to cover up how twisted he is, it’s embracing the twistedness of what he represents, shamelessly, and liking that, means you are not really seeing the reason he exists.

S: My thoughts are similar, I think People like Remus because he is so reveling in who he is, and what he is, in this day and age that’s a virtue values above almost everything else.

Me: But the problem is, vile people can love being evil. Thomas even brought up in the video a guy who went form hating his intrusive thoughts to enjoying them, and that led him to murder people. It’s like the virtue of pride in who you are, outweighs who you actually are. As long as you’re confident, people don’t care if you’re a jerk.

S: That reflects on the state of people’s souls today. All over you see people whether humorlessly or not humorlessly being self deprecating,

Me: Like sheep

S: But my point is it means we’re so hungry for any sort of self-love or being okay with oneself that we are willing to swallow gallons of poison just to get it.

Me: You think we’re exaggerating this?

S: Not in the slightest.

Me: Well there are a lot of characters like this in media, anime, reality shows, and a lot of jerk characters get to be popular because they are confident. Rainbow Dash from MLP, Bakugo form MHA, Gordon Ramsey, (I am not saying Gordon Ramsey is really a jerk, but the persona for his show was like that, and it was popular)

S: Loki, villains form all sorts of franchises, even Thanos.

Me: Can you elaborate more on what the appeal is? Or why people can’t resist it?

S: They can’t resist it because they don’t have any better examples. Almost all the characters who display this kind of self confidence are villains or at least natural in the war of good and evil.

Me: And good characters are often nervous, socially awkward, and lack confidence.

S: And that’s okay because those are obstacles they are meant to overcome not stay in, we love it when that happens. But no one gives a powerful example of a good person who is so confident in who they are. That’s why people over Bakugo.

M: I don’t think that’s why a lot of people love him. It’s why we love him. Also if we do have such a character, they usually die. Or get de-powerd.

S: That’s because the author doesn’t know how to write them properly.

M: *cough Pyrrha Nikos *cough.

S: But I think it’s what our culture desperately needs, what everyone is looking for, but we’ve been forced to look for in the wrong places.

M: You maybe be cutting people too much slack when you say we’ve been forced to look in the wrong places. More like, we lost interesting the wholesome stuff, and even when we are presented with innocence, many people go out of their way to corrupt it with their imaginations. Remus is more like a version of what some people willingly do, they’ve embraced it, maybe it started out as intrusive thoughts, but now they think them on purpose. And then they like it. And they spread it around to the rest of us, and that’s why characters like Remus end up popular. Because it’s popular to embrace the gross, smutty, pervy side of things. Even when they don’t really exist.

S: There’s a reason for that attitude though. It’s lack of power. See, people have abandoned innocence and 1950’s values, because they don’t think they work. They are faced with their won inner demons and the outer problems of the world running rampant, and if those things are supposed to be so great, why aren’t they working? Why don’t more people use them? Why is everything to terrible?

Me: Okay

S: People don’t think they can afford to stick with something that won’t be powerful enough to save them. So why bother? Just abandon all those useless values and platitudes. Embrace the smuttiness because that’s all you’ve got.

M: Remember I said intrusive thoughts are based in the fear of yourself? And that people embrace them because that is less painful than fighting them and not seeming to ever win? It’s the coward’s way out, but when you have no solution, it can seem like the best way out. Because it’s painless. Except when your conscience does bother you, but that’s less often over time. Like 1 Tim 4: 2 “Speaking lies in hypocrisy; having their conscience seared with a hot iron;’

S: Yeah, but it’s almost hard to blame the people who stop fighting it and start embracing it.

Me: (Maybe for you o_O ).

S: Because look at what they think their only other option is: People who keep fighting are in a constant state of inner turmoil and self hatred, just look at Thomas’es reaction through out the whole video, Thomas doesn’t know how to stop these thoughts, and neither do the people who embrace them. So it seems to reflect on who they are. If I’m damned either way at least I can be damned and comfortable. But the hard truth is it’s not comfortable it just pretends to be.

Me: Like I said when we talked about it before, in Romans 7 Paul asks “who will deliver me for this body of death?” and the inner turmoil he describes is just like Thomas’s, and all of ours, it’s the human condition.

But what is our solution then?

S: Well we both know, we can’t stop ourselves from having those thoughts, all we can do is deal with them when they come. The truth is we can’t save ourselves from it. That’s kind of the conclusion Thomas came to.

But Thomas, all he’s doing, is putting down faulty weapons, he doesn’t know how to pick up effective weapons.

Me: I think that would tick some fans off to hear, but he admitted it himself.

S: So the only way to be completely and totally free is to not think those thoughts anymore, but that’s impossible isn’t it?

Me: I could argue that you can be completely free while still having the thoughts, because you can be free of bondage to them. You don’t have to feel bad, and you don’t have to like them, they can just cease to have any power over you at all. And then they don’t come very often. I don’t have them nearly as much as I used to.

S: But why?

Me: Because I started asking God to fight the thought for me, instead of doing it myself. I would tel them to leave, but also ask Him to take authority over them, I remind the thoughts that God is higher than them, and that I have the mind of Christ. And then, it’s just doesn’t bother me anymore. And they go away. And I forget about it in a hour or so.

S: What really has been working for me, is remembering who God says I am. If He says that I am not some demented disgusting thing.

Me: Like Remus

S: But instead I am a pure, powerful, beautiful, warrior, who don’t have to take no crap, and royalty which helps, then these thoughts can’t be part of me. They are obviously from somewhere else.

Me: And that there is what I think people don’t have. Any sense of a better identity. So they have no other recourse than to say these are me, and I suck. Poor Thomas.

S: Well, he even decided they weren’t a reflection of his character.

Me: Yeah, but he didn’t go far enough. He still thinks it’s art of his imagination. I’d say it’s not, it’s just using his imagination. And what we feed our imagination is important. Part of the problem is that many people out all sorest of horror imagines, smutty images, inane humor, dirty jokes, into their mind, and then they are surprised when it regurgitates in a form they are less comfortable with. What you laugh at and enjoy effects what kind of intrusive thoughts you’ll get.

S: (Nods)…so to come back to the original question, as to why people like Remus and are reacting this way to him, it’s because we don’t think we can have anything better. And to an extend we don’t want anything better.

Me: If you’re satisfied with mud, you won’t get a trip to the beach, right? But also, he who is loves silver won’t be satisfied with silver, these people are never satisfied.

S: Yeah, cause they are taking their questions to the wrong place.

Me: We need to wrap it up.

Well, thank sis, for helping me discuss this, and figure this out. I feel kind of somber now. I feel bad for all these people. But I hope that some people found this post helpful as an explanation, or as a guide to maybe how you can deal with this problem better. I  like Thomas, and I didn’t want to criticize him, I just think he’s not got the whole picture.

So, until next time, don’t like Remus–Natasha and co.